We tend to spend a lot of time pouring into people, what we ourselves lack. Earlier this week I was having a conversation with a young lady who is doing exceptionally well in her field of trade. She recently launched a company that specializes in making custom made pillows. In the midst of how well she is ding, she was filled with a lot of self-loathing. She couldn’t get herself to look past her insecurities and did not want her face to be used for advertising purposes.
Similarly, I had another conversation with a young guy who is a qualified quantity surveyor, who is jobless. The saddest part of his journey is that his passions are in scripting and voice overs. He in turn is terrified of failing at life, as his passion does not merge with his qualification.
Now, I found myself pouring words of encouragement into these two people. Although incredibly different, they have one common denominator, they are both filled with fear. A fear of the unknown, a fear of rejection and a fear of failure, which all boils down to fear. Fear however is never as forth coming as it may appear, it usually stems from an underlying deficiency in ones life.
"Fear feeds of the areas that are not healed, the areas that were never addressed and the areas that lie beneath the mask we show the world. "
It comes from a place of lack, and because we generally do not take time out to study the origin, we end up fixing areas that are not where it is leaking from. It is like fixing a broken pipe, but you fix the part where it has finally burst and shows on the surface. However, the area that is clogged, is rarely the place where the burst occurs. Same applies to fear, it shows up in our lives in the areas where there is an overflow, however comes from an underlying place of lack. That lack can be different for each of us, but it requires the same solution – dealing.
As humans we ten to want to power into people the thing that we wish and hope someone would do for us. You find yourself going out of your way for your friends, giving whenever you can and being the person someone needs as often as you can. This comes from a place of need, because parts of us hope that someone ca extend the same courtesy. It ultimately comes from a pace that wants to be filled, it can be a need to feel appreciated or a need to feel philanthropic. Whatever that reason may be for you, knowledge it and ensure that it does not operate from a place of lack. I came to find that the reason I was always so giving was, because I love to receive and feel appreciated. Only, I started doing it so much so that I neglected my own needs and ability to fulfill my desire to receive. I then started gifting myself roses and dinner dates. The fulfillment that comes from this is amazing! I came from a place of expectation and went to a place of planting into myself to ensure I do not operate from a place of lack.
Face yourself and learn yourself.
With a tad bit of crazy